i believe in myself.

My creative juices seem to come in waves. Waves I can never really cling on to as much as I would like. I like to take little notes so the ideas I have don't fly out of my head too fast (I really hate how scatter brained I can be sometimes). I have a whole list of things I want to do but I can't find the right inspirations to follow them through.

A good friend of mine talked about the concept of a muse the other day. I've been close to having a muse before but it never lasted very long and at the time, I was always too distracted to have anything come from it. Sad. Other times my muse has been emotions - love, anger, sadness... but again, the same thing has happened. It's the pesky scatter brain and overly emotional states I tend to throw myself into.

This all frustrates me. I know I could accomplish some beautiful things for myself but I constantly get distracted. This is something I really miss about being in school. Art school was amazing for me because how they make you think and really get outside of yourself... to pick things apart. I don't look at the world in the same way. When I look at a poster I pick it apart and comment about the font choices. When I watch a film I notice the shot choices. I adore art. Art is life and the artist's view of the world is represented through their art.

I guess I just want my thoughts and vision to be represented also. I want to make my little mark beyond words on a blog. I don't want to be famous by any means (Los Angeles reminded me that that's the last thing I want) but I do want to feel connected with people the way I feel connected to certain artists.

I want to see beauty through your eyes..

It really amazes me what a year can do. Where I am in my life is no where where I thought I would be. I'm so hopeful and happy for the future surrounded by some beautiful souls.

Art is going to become more of a fixture in my life. I have some words and photos to post, very soon.